Regrets

There is no doubt that i have failed myself, but the worst part is in doing so i have failed those who kept their hopes within me. For someone like me who has lost hope, living every moment full of regrets, the bitterness of pain devouring every second, sadness slowly sipping every bit of life. I can not imagine it is lonely indeed to watch yourself behind the mirror without realizing i have built an impenetrable barrier around me. A barrier that would shield me from life's misfortunes. However, it came with a certain price i wasn't aware to begin with. A price that even a king's ransom is not even enough to pay its interest. As a matter of fact, it didn't help me either but made things worst. It would be a lie for me to deny that for countless times i have felt betrayed by people whom for once i have considered as a friend. Others may never be aware of my unpleasant experiences, for it is somewhat responsible for who i am now being protective and wary whom to consider a friend. Fortunate are those some because my trust to them would forever be absolute. In the end, I'm just like those nameless faces in the mist forever awaiting to be free from this bondage. Perhaps this is what we call life. In the end without realizing, I am left with nothing but emptiness and hollowness. Come to think of it, I haven't been truly happy for ages. I have truly lost how it is to smile and laugh with my heart. Perhaps this is the price I have to pay for the crimes and atrocities that I have done. Forever will the past hunt until what was wrongfully done be rectified.